First Swim

Cooper went for his very first swim last Friday. In attendance: mom, Karen, Kelly, and Joe. The weather was beautiful and the water was nice. He seemed to enjoy it for the first 10 minutes. However, Coop spent most of his time watching the ladies swim from the sidelines. He and Mr.Arwood bonded quickly. Joe is now at the TOP of our babysitter list. The two seemed to really enjoy one another. :)

Wordless Wednesday

Backyard Photo Shoot

First Time to Church

You know how you just feel like there is a little piece missing from your life?! We have been nervous about venturing out to church. However, we felt that it was time. It was a nice service - even though Pastor Brent was away in Florida. One of the highlights -  Cooper got to meet one of his future best buddies. It was a pretty cute meeting.

Gavin looks like he's saying - "Tell the boy to get his foot off me . . . before I have to smack him in his gums!"

AND . . . .VICTORY! Gav kicked Coop's foot away.

That's okay - he can ALWAYS entertain himself with the frog on his jumper.

Sweet Boys, they will have lots of fun some day.

Daddy and his Boy

Milk Does a Body Good

I've been struggling recently, struggling with the issue of pumping. I must say, I HATE IT! I spend hours a day tied to a machine, hours that I could be playing with my baby, sleeping, exercising (trying to lose this 30 or 40lbs I’ve been lugging around), etc. I have been going back and forth with the thought of giving it up. It would be different if Cooper would nurse. We could then have some quality bonding time. It’s just so hard to pump, store, wash, and feed. He’s six months old, he’s had lots of booby milk and there is PLENTY in the freezer, so why not?!

It’s something I’ve been doing for him since November 17th. When he was in the hospital and couldn’t eat, the ONLY thing that I could do for him – provide milk that could be tube fed. To be a mother without a baby, I was lost. I felt like a failure when my body gave out and they had to take him two months early. I felt I had failed myself, Charlie, and Cooper! So, while my baby was boxed up in the hospital, I took great pride in the pumping. It made me feel good to know that when he gained an ounce – it was because my body had provided the nutrients for him.

Just when I thought enough is enough. Tonight, Cooper decided to nurse! I felt a huge burden lifted from my shoulders. I’ve prayed about it, and just didn’t know what to do. Well, could there have been a clearer answer?! AND the pumping continues. (With, hopefully, spontaneous episodes of nursing to make it worth my while). :)

He also enjoyed pears for dinner, tonight!

Wordless Wednesday

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Half a Year

I can't believe my baby turned 6 months old yesterday. When I think back, I still feel very sad about all the time that was lost while he was in NICU. Yes . . . . I KNOW how very blessed I am to have a healthy baby boy at home with me. My mind comprehends this, but my heart does not. My mom frequently reminds me of how much worse things could've been. What she doesn't understand . . . . she never lost a moment with either of her babies. She didn't have to go 26 hours before the doctors would even let her see them. She didn't have to look at her baby with tubes crammed into his mouth, nose, etc. She didn't have to say good bye to her babies night, after night, after night.  Her heart did not break into pieces when she first saw a little skeleton of a baby that held half of her soul. Unless you've been there, unless you've been a NICU parent . . . . you have no way of understanding. When I think back, 6 months back, I'm overwhelmed with RAW emotion. I celebrate the 6 months of life that my baby has had, but it hurts when I think about being robbed of the first 2. I should have been the first person to hold him and to give him his first bath. I should've felt like his mom and not a visitor. It's ALL still sooooo much. The feelings are sooooo RAW. Would I do it all over again? In one heartbeat. I love that little bug with my whole being.

NOVEMBER

NOW